Lashes and Leopard Print...Never leave home without 'em

2/12/2018 Blog #9

We all know (or are or want to be) that friend or family member with nails and eyelashes as long as the distance between the earth and moon. Plump lips that resemble those of Goldie Hawn on First Wives’ Club chasing the straw around in her cocktail glass unable to get a grip on it. Wearing rings on every finger and adorning a minimum of 37additional pieces of flare. Ya’ know, the kind that would even put Phyllis Diller to shame. Teased, blonde hair (minus the cigarette) consuming copious amounts of Chardonnay. (Or Chardon-not as my friend, Colin, calls it.)

I have an aunt that fits this description. I’ll name her, Margaret Anne aka Grits. To say I love her is an understatement. She practically raised me. She adds spice to all family gatherings. Of course, in our case, family gatherings mimic rush hour in Hong Kong. As she and my mother would begin to discuss the latest Garden Club scandal she would look at me and say, “Dawlin’, go git my lipstick outta my pocketbook, please, and freshen up yo’ Mamma’s a drink while you’re at it.”” On this occasion, Aunt Grits had just come from her weekly beauty shop appointment at “The Fashionnaire.” She pulled up in her big red Cadillac and stepped out in her latest QVC purchase, a leopard print jacket that screamed…Grrrrrr. And I don’t know how she kept her balance, cuz’ those lashes were as thick and long as broom heads. As she began to complain about her horrific headache, my brother happened by the kitchen and quite loving replied, “Well, it’s probably those atrocious eyelashes. They look like two compact cars attached to your eyelids.” To which she replied, “Well, they are not for sissies.” ‘Inner beauty is great, but a little mascara never hurts.”

Although Aunt Grits attended Le Cordon Bleu Culinary School years ago, we always requested her Cornbread Salad. I’ll share the recipe which is guaranteed to be a hit at your next gathering. Ingredients: (You can always add or subtract depending on the number of folks being served)

· 1-2 boxes of Cornbread mix (you may add jalapenos and cream corn to the mix if desired) · 1-2 cans of Ranch Style Beans and/or Pinto Beans (with or without jalapenos) · Sour Cream · Dry package of Ranch Dressing mix · 10 strips Bacon · 1-2 cans of corn · Chopped chives · Chopped onion · 2-3 cups Shredded cheddar cheese · 2-3 Chopped tomatoes · 1 Chopped red pepper · 1 Chopped green pepper · Sliced jalapenos if desired…Our family likes lots! THEN…. · Bake cornbread and allow to cool. Once cool, cut into small squares or crumble. · Fry and crumble the bacon · Mix the sour cream and dry ranch dressing mix · Chop the veges Begin layering ingredients in a Trifle Bowl: · Cornbread · Beans · Corn · Sour cream mixture · Chopped veges · Shredded cheese · Bacon crumbles And…continue repeating until trifle dish is filled.

And in the words of Aunt Grits,”It’s all about presentation! You can make a hot dog look fancy if you serve it right.” LOL